Archive for the ‘Housewares’ Category

It’s Not Broken, It’s Modified

Finding a broken, mismatched, or otherwise worthless item at TJ Maxx is as difficult as finding hay in a haystack. But why throw away a mostly worthless item when you can attempt to sell it for slightly less money?

Would you like a set of 4 uh, 3, oh, who cares how many there are, just buy these freakin’ glasses. If you have a fourth person come over to your house, make them share.
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The mythical unibull lives at TJ Maxx. And no, it’s not a bull statue with one horn missing marked down a little so no one would notice. That would be stupid. A unibull is a more frightening, badass version of the unicorn. A unicorn for manly men, if you will. So buy this one!

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This girl teaches us a lot about overcoming challenges and that all of us are different. She clearly used to have arms, and she seems pretty happy despite her loss.

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I am kind of concerned that the bottle in her pocket indicates she was holding a baby. Oh, God. WHERE IS THE BABY? And can someone help our armless friend put on her other shoe?

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So, as you can see, broken houseware items are not distracting at all. Buy these!

Found by: Caroline
Found at: Tha Maxx, Kansas City (all on one day too!)

Bookends of Serial Killers

Oh, bookends. They’re great. Books say “I like to read” and these bookends say “I like to kill people.” If I were a director for a movie about a secret serial killer, I’d use this as a foreshadowing piece.

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And if you were wondering what happened to the heads and hands of those torsos, just walk down the aisle. In my movie, this tender moment of seduction is shown with romantic music,  just as the killer pulls out a steel garrotte.

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And at the end of my movie, the killer removes his faceade and his true identity as a Mime Construction Site Scarecrow is revealed…

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This character would be played by Gary Busey. It’s just an idea, but I think I should develop this screenplay. I’ll film it in revolutionary form of animation using only found objects from TJ Maxx. Cross your fingers!

Found by: Internet Gnomes (Flickr)
Found At: Unknown